Nothing. It looks like nothing because you don’t get anything done. It’s an empty box, sunshine without light, warmth without heat. Plans get demolished, not by anything sinister, but by life, by the forward progress of time, by the inevitable bullshit of living, the accretion of layers of stuff, things we have to climb over or swim through or dig under. Life goes on, sure, and stuff gets done, but other stuff – important stuff – doesn’t. When you’re a writer, albeit one that doesn’t live off their writing, time is that much more precious, and ambition that much higher a mountain to climb. Is my life moving forward? Yes. We even have a dog now, a lovely bagel (a basset-beagle mix) – how Montreal kind of a breed is that! – and my job progresses and my kid has a science fair tomorrow (we have vegetable powered clocks chez nous) and everything is moving forward, as it must, and then that’s the problem, everything moves forward, time, like tides, it doesn’t stop but not everything it does is for the better. Yes, the benefits of erosion depend on your point of view – and your sense of time.
Interesting fact: last year, I made more from my Twisters than I did from my book. Granted, I have only written one book and it was a book of short stories at that, and it was published in 2008 and that’s an eternity ago, but I still made more (quite a bit more) from my Twisters (I sold about 20 to two different high school anthologies published by the same company) than I did from Squishy. I don’t know what that says. I just thought it was interesting.
Another interesting fact: I am obsessed with the inane commentary of Jonathan Franzen. He is inane! The poor man does not understand anything about modern life. (there is even a tumblr devoted to his inanities!) Except, perhaps, what families talk about around kitchen tables. But the joke’s on him! There are NO MORE family discussions around kitchen tables. Bigger joke. There are hardly any more families! Families are like the New Urbanism now – they look nice in theory but no one lives there. Anyhow, I post most of the JF related stuff over on Facebook. I have a fan page. Because it’s the thing to do.
It is spring. My novel still seeks a publisher (hey publishers – get on it already!). I am still on Twitter (I can’t imagine a new media form I enjoy as much or that have been as enriching). I am trying to sit and write complete thoughts. Or even stories that have begun and then have ended prematurely. I have ideas. But what I need – what we all need – is a time machine. Not a Nicholson Baker type thing that freezes time (and only to fondle women at that) but one that changes the concept of it so that I can find the right kind of energy.
I don’t have time though. Can someone get on it?
