T 5690

We huddled under the tree, waiting for the storm to pass. We’re going to die, she told me, and then I took her hand. Pull my finger, I said.

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T 5689

She comments on my hat and I say, It’s a chapeau. She slaps me. The bartender mixes my gin gimlet. I also detest cats, I say. And she purrs.

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T 5868

He’d been sent to the pharmacy and he felt lost already. I need women’s things, he told the clerk. Dude, the clerk said. With understanding.

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T 5867

We went on a safari, trying to salvage something already dead perhaps. She loved the bull elephants. Because they made me feel so inadequate.

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The New Book Business

Here’s the thing. Yes, every writer should be pleased to be free of the shackles of the publishing industry. If you consider the industry to be like a bunch of evil plantation owners enslaving the poor writers of the world. It’s not, of course, but it is an industry and as in any industry it’s main purpose is to sell enough product so that it can sell even more product. Yes, there are some altruistic publishers out there. They should be supported, respected and deified. But like that joke about the airline business (If you want to be a millionaire in the airline business, start with a billion dollars), these people either started with deep pockets or are a better type of person  than you or me. OK, mostly they’re better than me.

Today, though, the industry has changed. Great. Great for the writers! Now THEY get to do all the work. They get to write and then they get to create the physical (or digital) product, market it, sell it and then find more time for writing.

I can see that working for some writers. (And don’t get me wrong, there are interesting developments out there for writers with new forms and formats and business models.) But I can’t see that working for all writers. And I would hazard to say that most writers don’t want to do it all on their own. They just want to write. It’s why artists have art dealers. It’s why some people talk about “art” and some talk about “craft” and some talk about “hobby.” And some, the few, talk about “business.” And I can’t help but think the type of work we see coming out is more “industrious” in a weird kind of way. The genre book is stronger than ever before and it’s not just Harry Potter’s fault. If anything, JK Rowling caught the zeitgeist early and rode it. The fantasy world of Hogwarts was waiting to be discovered because it was already there. And Hogwarts begat the vampire which begat the zombie which begat…

No one, however, talks about time. This new book business takes up a lot of time. I mean, writing takes up enough time already. Ask any writer why they want to sell lots of books and they will talk about buying time. Time really does equal money. Now time also equals a business plan. Meaning writers will have to come off their pedestal and join the real world. Writers often say that the real work is in the editing. That’s still true. But editing is just the start of the real work.

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Pretty sure this should be my epitaph

Because it’s a pretty good one.

(Though truth be told, I’m going to be cremated….hopefully not anytime soon)

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The Week in Video

I did some video this week. The people at VYou asked me to respond to questions and I did. A lot of them. Perhaps 30. All of this on Monday night. After each video response was posted, I shot it to Twitter.

That may have been a mistake.

A few peeps wrote me to tell me that my account had been hacked “by VYou” and that I was sending out awesome amounts of spam. Why did they think this? If they just clicked on the links it would have been obvious I was answering questions by video. Because. Because it’s not what I do. I don’t normally send out multiple tweets in a short amount of time. (Yesterday, for example, I only wrote one tweet.) I did and somehow I broke the compact I have with my followers.

It was off brand. If, you know, I have a brand. But it was off, like ham that’s been in the fridge too long. I was off not in the content but in the delivery. So, naturally, I lost hundreds of followers. I think it’s the first time, ever, that my follower count has gone down.

Lesson learned, again. Content is nothing without strategy.

But I also found this. A student at Red River College (which is in Winnipeg), a place where I have a lot of followers (all students in the Creative Communications department – can someone from RRC tell me why you’re all following me? Am I on the curriculum or something?). Anyhow, this guy, Kieran Moolchan, decided to post some dramatic readings of my Twisters to YouTube. I’m quite tickled by them.

Also, and this was weird. I was in Columbus this weekend (I was speaking at a conference called Content Marketing World – hence the “content is nothing without strategy” line earlier) and they brought in Rick Springfield. No really. He even has a new album coming out. He sang what may very well be the “single” (if they even have singles anymore). The title? I Hate Myself. (other song titles from the new album? Our Ship’s Sinking, Love Screws Me Up, Depravity – either he’s playing the tortured artist or someone really isn’t all that happy and there might be something there – he is Rick Springfield after all) I thought, well, that’s sad (though perhaps not sadder than this). But then he tried to get the crowd to sing the chorus out loud. The response was tepid. This was a crowd that understood irony for the most part. And so Rick gave up with the sing along thing. That was sadder still. I will say this, however. The guy looks pretty amazing for a 63-year old. Though his back up band had a strong Spinal Tap quality to them.

To end with the video angle. Jack Hanna of the Columbus Zoo spoke to the conference on the final evening. He brought out some exotic cats. He told stories about his life. He left. He’s a simple but passionate man who does what he loves and he left the stage to a standing ovation. It wasn’t hard to understand why. His brand is solid. And he’s true to it.

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Ask Me Anything

This Monday, September 3, 2012, at 9:00 PM (eastern time), I am going to answer questions online. You should start posting them right now on VYou (by clicking here). I will answer all of your questions I, especially the dumb and aggressively obnoxious ones. So start your Labor Day weekend by asking me a question. And then ruin your weekend by actually watching….

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How Much is That Book Review in the Window?

A big kerfuffle after the New York Times published a story about a guy doing what every one in the world had to suspect at some point that every one was actually doing all along: he was paid to write reviews for books on Amazon. And some very big writers at Amazon were part of the ploy. I think people need to remember something. The book blurb is marketing. And like in everything else, sometimes you go too far. The line between brilliant idea and awful lie can sometimes be very very tiny. But the idea of using a blurb to sell books? That’s what it’s there for. And the reader reviews on Amazon are there for one reason only: marketing. Yes, yes, community, sharing, blah blah blah. Democracy. No. The reader reviews are Amazon’s way of making you stay on the site longer. They are stickiness. They were not put there for any other reason. The more you share, the longer you’re on the site. And the longer you’re on the site, the more stuff you buy. And dishonest reviews? Please. It’s nothing new. In each and every issue of the late great Spy magazine, a small section called Logrolling in our Time proved to everyone that cynicism is a valid defence mechanism when reading blurbs. Any blurb. They knew then. Proving once again, AGAIN! that nothing is free.

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Books Need to Get Bookier

Look at these things. They are gorgeous. I would never have read….no, that’s not true. I would have read them in any form imaginable.  A Joseph Conrad novella (that I’d never read, from a series from Melville House that I’d never heard of) and F. Scott on booze! I found them at my neighbourhood bookstore, and every time I go in I’m thankful that it exists. But look at the books. I wish you could touch them. But you can’t. Not on the internet.

And that’s the point. I’ve long said “print needs to be printier” and I think books need to be bookier. They may lose to digital in the convenience department (not just in the carrying of them, but also in the purchase of them; man it’s easy to buy a digital book and yesterday I bought three off Amazon…) but they win in the sensual department.

Books are sensual objects. Writing, on the other hand, is a form of communication. But when they come together, is there anything better than a book? Like F. Scott on booze? Booze!

 

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