Tagged: Guys (1,814)

He has issues with sugar and it puts off beautiful women. This conflicts with his standards and self worth. But he has a fine tie collection

Jack knew he didn’t need to see the doctor but he went anyway. The doctor said there was nothing wrong with him. I can’t hear you, Jack said

The car rolled pathetically to a complete stop. This is the middle of nowhere, she said. I know, he sighed. His penis had never felt smaller

They swam in the ocean, warm like a bath, and he stood up and peed and that ruined her mood. But for him it was the normal course of things.

He says, I need to go to Vegas. She puts some tofu concoction into his mouth and kisses him and he pulls away and says, That won’t work now.

The embrace felt desperate. Lonely. He pulled away. I don’t want to be that person, he said. You mean happy? she asked, gritting her teeth.

The guys told Bill, Stop wearing a dress. And Bill took the rage he felt inside and took a mallet to his wife’s car. And she was not amused.

Jim orders another bourbon. I deserve some love, he says to no one. He surveys the bar. He’s alone. How do you swing? he asks the bartender.