Tagged: Guys (1,814)

He walks into the bar, all power pin stripes, and orders a freshly squeezed orange juice. She says, That’s almost kind of sexy. He knows it.

He says, Someone save me from the mudpile of my life. He says this to no one because he is alone and everyone knows he’s just a drama queen.

Jim fell out of the tree and the girls laughed and he knew he should make a joke just then but his legs were broken and the pain was awesome

He sees her, and even though he’s married, he knows his life has changed forever. He approaches her. And she breaks his nose with one punch.

There’s room in the car and he knows it but he hasn’t showered in days and the girls in the back are cute. It’s raining. I’m moist, he says.

He heard sirens and sighed with relief. He rubbed her back to reassure her. He knew she wouldn’t make it. You owe me ten bucks, he whispered