He yawns and finishes his drink and says, I’m tired. He stands up slowly. I’ve been tired for so long, he sings. And then he grabs a guitar.
Tagged: Guys (1,814)
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The Lonely Man stumbles and screams, I hurt my foot! and when he realizes no one has noticed he yells louder. And then he laughs at himself.
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That time I confused “anatomy” with “archeology.” It wasn’t meant as a roundabout way to call her old. Or even old-ish. I am not that smart.
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I’m wearing a blue shirt, he writes and hits send. She replies with: Who is this? Then: Why should I care? Thus his experiment is a failure.
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She loved me. Until I didn’t recommend her on LinkedIn. But I’ve never worked with you, I explained. She told me I didn’t understand “life.”
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He was being weird and she asked, Do you even breathe oxygen? but he was awful at science and so he said, Ok? but in the form of a question.
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One night we came upon a man with a megaphone. We come from fish, he proclaimed. He smells like fish, my wife joked. That’s me, I whispered.
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She catches him picking his nose and he decides he’s going to be a man for once and he says, Yes I was picking it, and she leaves screaming.
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His effort was real and sincere and then it was done. She said, Is it over? and then he knew it had not been enough and he checked his phone.
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He sits in the backseat reading the day’s bad news. He loves his life, but it’s not enough. Drive us off a cliff, he commands the chauffeur.
