T 5746

He cleared his throat. They went quiet. He hesitated. I feel underappreciated, he said. So there’s a baseline? his daughter asked sincerely.

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T 5745

He locked himself in the bathroom and yelled, Tell her to go home. He felt ill, actually. He was suffering the tyranny of first impressions.

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T 5744

It was late, and he had smartly managed to end up in front of his house. I live here, he told her. And now she knew why he smelled so funny.

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T 5743

They strolled along the boardwalk arm in arm and stopped at a jewelry shop and he looked at the prices and said, I don’t love you that much.

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T 5742

They went for ice cream. He said, I don’t want you to analyze everything, and he ordered a soft double vanilla and she had to roll her eyes.

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T 5741

She felt the ground shake. Was that an earthquake? she asked. He hadn’t felt anything and didn’t respond. Ten years later, she said, You bum.

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T 5740

He ran and kept running, and she got in a car and said, I’m here for you, and then she said, Why run? and he said, I don’t know how to stop.

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T 5739

He wakes, still drunk from the night before, and he opens a beer, and she says, Enough already. But he doesn’t know who she is, so he burps.

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T 5738

I’m going for a walk, he announced, and a month later he called his family from hundreds of miles away and said, These shoes are so amazing.

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T 5737

And after some small talk she excuses herself and then returns and he says, I want to kiss you, and she backs away and says, I just threw up.  

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