T 5260

He obsesses over the new girl in the office. One day she catches him smelling her chair. At least I wasn’t in it, she says. His heart aches.

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T 5259

They woke and she sighed and said, I feel dead when you kiss me. But he made lemonade out of that lemon and wrote a book. It sold very well.

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T 5258

After the argument we hugged and made up and she put her hands around my throat and said, I could kill you, and it sounded like she meant it.

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T 5257

The guy who got hit by a car wears a shirt saying “Weekends Are for Losers.” The paramedic says, Who’s the loser now? We’re all thinking it.

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T 5256

Theirs was a food court romance. A flirtation around cheap chow mein. Sip your soda again, he’d tell her. As she caressed his leg with hers.

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T 5255

He said, Come over and we’ll watch some TV, and she laughed and said, You’re so old fashioned, and he didn’t get it and she never came over.

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T 5254

He opened the door. She rushed past him. He breathed in the air of her departure and it was acrid and he lit a smoke and made her disappear.

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T 5253

He fell and yelled in pain and she ran over and he smiled and said, i was being dramatic, and she kicked him and he tried not to yell again.

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T 5252

He told her he was a statistician and she didn’t care, but when he said, Visualize this, she took it out of context and threw up everywhere.

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T 5251

She told me what to do, and I did it, I sat on it, and then she arched her eyebrows and I arched mine as well because it actually felt good.

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