At the taco stand he says, My dog jumped the shark. She says, You mean this fish taco? He says, Damned thing won’t eat steak. She says, Yum.
Tagged: Pets (140)
Twister 779
The dogs circled them, their wet noses working overtime. They were hungry. Their tongues were ready. But the dogs weren’t allowed on the bed
Twister 1335
Liz, Brad’s ex, called him 50 Seconds. She had t-shirts printed and got media attention. He bought an incontinent dog. And named it Impotent
Twister 1884
I hated the dog. But she had to bring the mutt along. And when the boat started to take on water, she said, The dog ate the flotation device
Twister 2671
They had intimacy issues. Not with each other but even a hint of groping elicited howls from her dogs. Have they seen me naked? he wondered.
Twister 3341
The dog howled its lament. He eased out of sleep and looked around. He still felt guilty about stuff. He called the dog. And started the car
Twister 254
He is afraid of lawnmowers in a Stephen King kind of way. He sees one and is bowled over by waves of theremin. He tells his dog to hurry up.
Twister 814
When the dogs started growling she’d had enough. I don’t care how big, she said. But she knew that wasn’t true. She cared how big. Very much
Twister 1343
They had grown old together, investing in a relationship that valued honesty. I don’t like it when you see a dog’s asshole, he said suddenly
Twister 1885
The dog was coming at them but Jim merely walked quicker. What’s wrong with you? she yelled. Whenever I run fast I poop my pants, he replied
