Tagged: Food (993)

She didn’t know why she was so apathetic but the pizza guy had a theory. I’m your worst nightmare, he said. No that’s ice cream, she replied

He dreamed that he was buried in pasta with a rosé sauce, and he woke up and saw her with her head in the fridge. Please come back, he said.

She heard strange noises in the night and found him downstairs slathering sourdough with mayonnaise and he saw her and said, It’s a metaphor

And she weeped. And he asked her why she was crying. And she didn’t say anything. And then he opened a bag of chips. And she cried some more

She figured he was empty but then he said, I like the umami in the anchovy, and she thought about reconsidering but, man, his breath stank.

He ate an onion roll while riffing on the inanity of bobble head dolls and boasting about his own grooming and she said, Your breath stinks.

He dropped the strawberries and they scattered across the room. Don’t move, she said. And he didn’t. Neither did she. So now what? he asked.