Tagged: Food (993)

A beetle ran across the table just as the waiter served the dumplings. He put the plate down on it. I saw that, Jim said. Saw what? he asked

He gave a lousy interview on TV and now there were reporters on his front lawn. Let’s serve them hot dogs, he told his wife. The poison ones

The foodie refuses to date vegetarians. Yes, he married a woman who likes to bring out handcuffs when he suggests Thai. But she’s not joking

He grilled two t-bones and poured a robust Barolo. There’s nothing like a good butcher, he said. Later, she lay sleepless in bed. Terrified.

The chocolate maker showers her with his sweet magic, relentlessly, but with kindness. And then she dies. Because of her lactose intolerance

He orders the ribs and a soda. She orders the veggie dip appetizer. I want to love more of you, he says. You can never be too thin, she says

He told some jokes and grilled hot dogs and bought all the beer and at the end of the evening his wife said, I don’t think anyone likes you.