I splurged on the toilet seat. My wife called me frivolous. Now I sit when I pee. I read books in there. So I’m also drinking more. Because.
Tagged: Family (813)
Twister 632
The baby was crying again and neither of them wanted to get up. I got him last time, he mumbled. And she reached down and pinched a testicle
Twister 713
He was a fast runner but only if he ate salmon. And it had to be grilled. With lemon and tarragon. But fish don’t have legs, his mother said
Twister 771
He thought that if he took the kid fishing, and had The Talk then, it would be easier. But the kid got obsessed with the worms. In a bad way
Twister 870
And at the end of the endless day, Jones danced on his father’s mahogany desk and, with the contract in hand, he squatted and did his thing.
Twister 951
The ground rumbled. Jim stood immobile as the children raced past him. He closed his eyes in fear and prayed. The ice cream truck drove away
Twister 1072
At the park he saw a girl and a boy doing the things his mom told him not to do. They were having fun. And so he never trusted his mom again
Twister 1252
He spent his day at the mall with his wife and kids. Lost amid the incessant shopping, the gluttony of need, he imagined doing awful things.
Twister 1323
He found his mother’s toys in a box under her bed. He showed them to his babysitter and she said, oh wow. So she put him to bed. And played.
Twister 1416
She’s a stunner, at least he thinks so. And Jim would try and pick her up except his kid’s with him and the kid tells his mother everything.
