Twisters

Her email arrived with a ludicrous ping and I read it and she’d broken up with me and I thought, That’s so modern, and I had a t-shirt made.

The fly acts on a compulsion and flies into the light and gets zapped. That’s your rapture right there, I say. And then I stare at the light.

I bummed a smoke from the cute chick and she gave me one without looking at me and I asked for a light and she said, I don’t like needy men.

Everything was in the laundry and I wore old pants and a friend said, You’re betraying your personal brand, but at least I didn’t smell bad.

He squeezed the heavy book onto the shelf and the shelf collapsed on top of him and he as lay there dying he thought it a proper way to die.