Twisters

T 6278

And then the car rolled to a stop. That’s it, I said and I started to laugh. The rain picked up. Things were bleak. You’re weird, she said.

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T 6277

We’d chased the bad guys out of town. There was free whiskey awaiting us at the saloon. I sure do love you boys, Doc said. Like he meant it.

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T 6276

She’d been told he was funny but this heightened her expectations to impossible levels. Take off your clothes, he says. She laughs nervously.

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T 6275

It was low tide. I found a starfish in a tidal pool. The ocean was far away. The world is cruel, I thought to myself. As a gull pooped on me.

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T 6274

We argued about the pronunciation of a common word, and she said, This is like foreplay to you, and I said, You mean furplay, and it was on.

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T 6273

Their kid comes running over and says, Dad I lost my tooth! and his father says, I lost my job! and the mother says, There is no tooth fairy.

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T 6272

The breeze was like a confirmation of magic. He ordered another drink and buried his toes in the sand. I might have chlamydia, she told him.

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T 6271

The heckling starts early in the show. The comedian breaks down and cries. The audience explodes. He thinks he’s made it, missing the point.

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T 6270

I spilled my wine. My shirt turned burgundy. I said, At least it wasn’t milk. But she called me stupid. And my life went downhill from there.

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T 6269

I took the cucumber out of my pants. She sagged visibly then. Plastic bags were extra, I said. That night, our salad tasted like bitterness.

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