Twisters

T 5489

She walked up to the guy and said, How hot are you? and he said, I’ve funded six start-ups, and she laughed the laughter of the unimpressed.

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T 5488

She rolls her eyes so far back she goes blind. Her father finds her lack of exasperation humorous. I wish you could see how I feel, she says.

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T 5486

The financial analyst was hit by a car, abandoned his job and started dabbling in poetry. You’re more useless now, said his bewildered wife.

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T 5485

He ambles into the kitchen and kisses her forehead and pours himself a coffee. That was the longest night ever, she says. Not in a good way.

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T 5483

She reached for the stinkiest, bluest cheese on the tray, and he felt resentment. You’ve taught me a lot about myself this evening, he said.

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T 5482

The relationship was done. It just lacked the courage of closure. And then they argued about the color of his tie. She thought it was peach.

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T 5481

A kid walks up to him and kicks him in the shins and he limps away and the kid says, That’s some limp, and laughs and doesn’t stop laughing.

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T 5480

He feels old now as he watches his extended family fete his life, the fruits of his loins. Be careful what you wish for, he says, to no one.

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T 5479

They kissed and went their separate ways, unsure of the night or its true meaning. There is love but not enough of it. At least not for her.

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T 5478

He opened the wine and poured a glass and joined the kids in front of the TV, and he sipped the wine and winced and said, I could do better.

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