They lay in the grass and watched the meteor shower and he said, Stuff like this makes you feel small, and so she wasn’t interested anymore.

You have a stain on your shirt, she says. And there it is, near my pants. I’m flattered you looked there, I say. She wets a tissue. Game on.

He sauntered into the room ready for love and she farted and said, Come here, and he said, Irony shouldn’t be the basis of our relationship.