She got up and went to pee and I started clearing the table and I heard her fart and she said, Oops, and then I knew she was in love with me.
Tagged: Love (951)
T 6219
We grew old and too fat for our clothes. I blame your pie, I said one day. I still had to clean the toilet. But I had trouble bending over.
T 6218
The ancient man boards a bus and sits next to a past-her-prime-but-still-beautiful woman. She says, No small talk. And he proposes marriage.
T 6211
The restaurant offends him. We’re so better than this, he thinks. I love someone else, she says. He fumes. Try the duck tartar, he suggests.
T 6210
The unimaginable happens and they kiss. He keeps his eyes closed, waiting. Nothing happens. Normally this is when disaster strikes, he says.
T 6180
He looks at himself in the mirror and frowns. From the bed she says, It won’t be that awful. She’s naked. And so he says yes to yoga classes.
T 6167
She asks me to dance. I blush and she finds this charming. I can’t dance, I tell her. She says I’m cute. I can barely walk, I say, helpfully.
T 6159
My glasses broke so I fixed them with tape. You’ve become one of those people, my wife said. And later that night we made love in a new way.
T 6140
We climb the tree and she touches me tenderly. I slip and tumble to the ground. My legs shatter. Are you ok? she asks. Love hurts, I reply.
T 6136
She bites into her peanut butter sandwich. He enters the cafeteria. She is smitten and approaches him. While he goes into anaphylactic shock.
