Twister 3478

They met for drinks and flirted and he could sense the making of something magical and then she said, You’re hot online but not in real life

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Twister 3477

She’s afraid of leaving him. Because he has a voice like the guy who does the movie trailers. This time it’s serious! he says, dramatically.

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Twister 3476

She kissed his forehead and said, Do you remember? and he put a finger to her lips and said, I’m way too drunk to remember much of anything.

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Twister 3475

And when he didn’t look up from the magazine he was reading she said, You don’t care anymore, and then he looked at her and said, Never did.

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Twister 3474

He spent the day looking out the window, marveling at the snow. And every time a snowplow passed by he’d giggle. Grow up, his wife told him.

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Twister 3473

The waiter dropped the cheeseballs on her lap and ran out of the bistro and the owner rushed over and said, I’ve wanted to fire him forever.

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Twister 3472

She refused his offer for coffee. I’ll have some tea if you have it, she said. And he reached way back to remember his lessons in tolerance.

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Twister 3471

The dog did his business on the floor and I said, Let’s just sell the house, and my wife said, Your laziness is amazing, and I had to agree.

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Twister 3470

He ran toward her and she toward him. He slipped and fell. She tried hard to suppress her laughter. You’re cute, she said. He’d heard worse.

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Twister 3469

He downs a shot and says, Her hands were rough but that didn’t bug me. Then he hobbles off to the toilet. While his friends pee their pants.

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